Biblical Foundations: The Ultimate Goals

As you approach the task of sex education, be encouraged that as a follower of God, you and your child will prosper as you help him or her handle the gift of sexuality the way God, the Gift-Giver, intended. God’s Word shows us four ways in which following him leads us to prosper.

  1. Prosper in Pleasing God with Our Obedience

The greatest benefit of conducting our sexual lives in the manner in which God urges us to, and teaching our children to do the same, is that we can know we are doing what our Father wants us to do and are pleasing him. Scripture promises that in obedience—in living as God wishes—our faith can be completed or perfected:

His delight is not in the strength of the horse,

nor his pleasure in the legs of a man,

but the Lord takes pleasure in those who fear him,

in those who hope in his steadfast love.

Psalm 147:10-11

[Jesus said,] “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. . . . Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him. . . .” “If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. Whoever does not love me does not keep my words. And the word that you hear is not mine but the Father’s who sent me.”

John 14:15, 21, 23-24

And by this we know that we have come to know him, if we keep his commandments. Whoever says “I know him” but does not keep his commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him, but whoever keeps his word, in him truly the love of God is perfected. By this we may know that we are in him: whoever says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which he walked.”

1 John 2:3-6

  1. Prosper in Safety from Calamity

Sexual-activity rates remain high among teens, even though they have declined a bit since their peak around 1990; approximately 68 percent having had sexual intercourse by their nineteenth rates continue to climb, and teen pregnancy continues to be at troubling levels. Premarital chastity and marital monogamy are safeguards against unwanted pregnancy and the transmission of sexually transmitted diseases.

In living according to God’s law, we experience the joy and blessing of sex as God meant it, free from fear. Obedience creates safety; we can live without fear of the devastation that can come from illicit sex. The bible speaks often about such devastation and danger. Typical passages include such warnings in Proverbs 5:1-14 about the “forbidden woman” (verse 3), likely a prostitute but also inclusive of any sexually immoral partner. The writer warns that “in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword,” and that “Her feet go down to death; her steps follow the path to Sheol” (verses 4- 5; likely referencing the dangers of STIs and spiritual ruin). He warns also that you do not want to “give your honor to others and your years to the merciless, lest strangers take their fill of your strength, and your labors go to the house of a foreigner” (verses 9-10), nor the ultimate outcome of finding oneself “at the brink of utter ruin in the assembled congregation” (verse 14), likely references to destruction of marital, familial, church, and social relationships. The apostle Paul spoke similarly of sexual sinners “receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error” (Romans 1:27), likely speaking about negative physical, social, and spiritual consequences of immorality. The risks of illicit sex are stark compared to the blessings of marital sex: closeness, intimacy, physical pleasure, children, and unity.

More broadly, obedient Christians are also safer from the relational confusion and emotional traumas that premature and inappropriate sexual intimacy can foster. We are not only safe from bad things but also have the blessing of experiencing the good God intended in giving us the gift of sexuality.

Some content taken from HOW AND WHEN TO TELL YOUR KIDS ABOUT SEX, by Stan and Brenna Jones. Copyright © 1993, 2007, 2019. Used by permission of NavPress. All rights reserved. Represented by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. To purchase books in the GOD’S DESIGN FOR SEX book series, go to